Saturday, April 25, 2009

no clue

Tyler is being trouble. It seems like every afternoon around 3:40 when my school-age cuties come bounding out and into my car Ty has a mischievous little grin. He has a certain story to share about his day.

Last week we had two recess academy's, two incidents involving tears on the playground, and as a bonus an email on Friday about a Gameboy that somehow made it's way into his pocket before he left the house that morning.

We recently had a talk with Ty about sneaking things, not sure if he learned anything. Do 7 year olds learn anything with these kind of talks? I offered (or threatened) to sew his pockets closed if that would help...

I've never really gotten mad at him for what he does at school. He is a good student. Sometimes he giggles in class out of turn and sometimes he wants to bring things to school to share with his friends. I suppose I can't blame him.

I ask myself, do I reprimand him for these "normal things" or do I reassure him with my usual..."I remember doing those kinds of things."

Then my next question is, do I want him to feel confident in himself and free to make good choices ON HIS OWN, or do I want him to be disciplined and always do what he is told. And if he always does what he is told does that mean he will cave into peer pressure as a teen. And if I let him make his own choices how far will he go? Yikes...

Do I separate school from home...let the school discipline stay at school? How many times do you need to hear from someone what you've done wrong?

So I digress...where is that frickin' manual, how do I parent a 7 year old boy again??


Michelle said...

I can hardly parent my almost two year old child...I am a loss for 7 year old boys. But that's what's great about you being my friend. You can figure it all out and in 5 years I will come to you for advice:)

Nate said...

I'm no expert, by any means, but with our kids we emphasize the fact that every decision, good or bad, has consequences and by making a choice to do, or not do, something, they are also choosing to accept whatever consequences are attached to that decision. Make your expectations of him clear and then CONSISTENTLY stick to them, no matter what discipline the school decides to dish out. Empower him to make his own decisions but teach him the importance of studying out the consequences first. When the time comes where peer pressure is an issue, he will already understand that he has the power to choose and that his choices have nothing to do with anybody else. Hopefully, that will make him confident enough, and strong enough, to chart his own course. Leaders act, while followers are acted upon. Of course, it that doesn't work, don't blame me for his future therapy. I'm just winging it with my own kids like all the rest of the parents in the universe!

kaye said...

Shane also had a great many "pocket" issues throughout his early years. What can I say?? As a very "old" mom and a teacher, all I can say is pray...hopefully some inspiration will come. Be extra sure to hug and kiss him a lot, he will be 30 in no time at all.